Monday, April 6, 2015

Route 69 S105: El Paso TX (Part 1)



Fuck, Texas is a big ass state. I'm not a moron. I knew this, but somehow it didn't really hit me until now. I've been on the road for seven hours in blistering heat and I'm still not across this fucking state.

When my buddy Jeff and I decided to head to Dallas for a month, because of his job as a pro wrestler, I figured I'd drop by on a few friends. "You're in Texas, I'll be in Texas! I want to see the place." Big mistake. They've set up an alternative energy farm out here, east of El Paso. They're idealistic science geeks, but they've got backing and their work looks promising. I know what you're thinking. Actually, that's a lie, I have no idea what you're thinking. I know what I'm thinking. Rural west Texas and alternative energy. What? They don't seem to go together, but whatever.

Either way, I didn't realize that I'd be in for this kind of drive or that it would be unseasonably warm, even for Texas. They have a pool, horses, bikes and all sorts of amenities, so at least I can look forward to a relaxing vacation. I brought my iPad loaded with books to spend the days just lounging while they work on their experiments.

I left the main highway long ago, moving onto smaller and smaller roads. For the last fifteen minutes, I've been running along a dirt road in my vintage 1958 Corvette convertible, which was not designed for off-road. My phone lost GPS signal five minutes ago and I think I'm hopelessly lost. Just as I decide to turn around and backtrack, I hit something in the road. I pull over and see that I have a flat. Motherfucker.

I look around and see nothing. Literally nothing but land.


I haul out the spare and get to work. By the time I'm done, my white tank top is a soaking wet, see-through mess.


I pull out my phone. At least I have a signal. Maybe I can describe this empty wasteland to my friends and they can re-direct me. Before I can even enter my password, I hear boots crunching on the ground. I turn to I see a cowboy approaching me. It's either a cowboy or a mirage. I can't be sure, because he's smoking hot - handsome, shirtless in jeans and ripped. If I was suffering from heat stroke, he's exactly what I would imagine.


The cowboy walks up, looking me up and down. His first words are, "What're y'all doing here?" His voice is deep and raspy with a sexy Texas drawl. His tone, on the other hand, is harsh and accusatory.

I apologize, "Oh, hey. Dude, I got lost."

"Yer trespassing." Again, his tone is not friendly.

"Oh, okay. At least that means this place is somewhere then. I mean, it's somewhere I could trespass. That's actually a relief to me. It's a helluva lot better than being nowhere, right?"

"Didn't y'all see the signs?"

"Signs? There were signs? Dude, I didn't see anything. I've got no idea where I am. I was about to turn around, but I got a flat," I point to the open trunk.

"Whatever. Just git goin'. Now."


I've about had it with Sheriff Attitude here. I tell him, "Okay, but look at me and look at my fucking car. Use context clues, for fuck's sake. Shit, it's not like I'm a cattle rustler or trying to rob the next stage coach. Just point me in the direction of Future Farms and I'll go."

The cowboy eyes me up and down. He says, "What's yer business with them?

I smirk, "My business is none of yours. Are you going to help me or just continue to be a complete and total asshole?"

The cowboy comes right up to me, "What's yer name?"

"Ben, why?"

"Well, Ben. I'm Toby. I like to know a man's name before I kick his ass." Before I even realize it, the cowboy swings his fist into my gut. OOF! I double over and he slams his fist into the side of my head. I see stars as I collapse to the ground, but I scramble to my feet. Toby is waiting. He fires another fist into my gut. The cowboy grabs my hair and forces me back up to a standing position. I raise my fists to defend myself, but it's too little, too late. He hits a combination body punch then a left cross that has me loopy. Next thing I know, his right fist is coming up, slamming into my chin. CRACK!

The next thing I remember is waking up in bed, my friend Sara hovering over me, nursing my wounds.

Cabin Number Three

I feel fine, just embarrassed. I guess I drove in the back way through a gate that was supposed to be locked. Apparently the work here is a little more advanced and secretive than windmills and solar panels. There are cowboys patrolling the perimeter of the farm. They had my name and knew I was coming, but Toby's an off-duty ranch hand who decided to take matters into his own hands.

They're going to fire Toby, but I ask them to wait, explaining that I'm not sure I want a guy to lose his job over a misunderstanding. They agree that if I'm cool, they'll keep him. Apparently Toby's brother Beau is very good at his job and they'd rather not risk losing him along with Toby, unless I'm really pissed about the whole thing.

The next day, I get an amazing tour of the facility. After that, I grab a bike to "clear my head" and check out the horses.


Well, that's what I tell them. I'm actually looking for Toby. We have some unfinished business. Just five minutes later, I'm at cabin number three, home to Toby, banging on the barn-style sliding front door. He yells, "Come the fuck in."

I slide the wood door open and enter. The walls are taupe adobe, obviously deliberately distressed. The furniture is all wood and very rustic. Quaint. From another room, I hear Toby muttering, "Let's get this shit over with. I know I'm canned." Toby emerges from what I assume is a bedroom, looking angry, pulling on a pair of jeans. When he sees me, he relaxes and the asshole gets the biggest smirk on his face.


I say, "Howdy."

Toby just smirks, "Hey, it's you. What the fuck do you want?"

"I figured you'd have something to say to me."

Toby scratches his chin and thinks. He says, "Say to you? Sure. Uh, your car was cool to drive. How 'bout that?"

"What?"

"They didn't tell you? After you went down, I had to get you up to the main house somehow. I strapped you to the luggage rack and drove you up. You got a sweet ride."

I'm pissed, but I keep my emotions in check. "You obviously know they wanted you fired." Toby shrugs and tries to act nonchalant, but his eyes betray him. "Yeah, save the act. That's what you thought the knock was." Again, I read it in his eyes, but I also notice a full duffel bag on the floor.

Toby says, "Yeah, I figured you'd pull a bitch move like getting me canned."

It's my turn to smirk, "Oh, don't worry. I'm not letting you off that easy. I convinced them to keep you around, but here's what's going to happen. You and me? We're having a re-match. Wrestling this time."

Toby completely relaxes and smiles, "Fuck yeah. Seriously? I keep my job AND get to kick your ass again? Shit, let's do it now. My little brother Beau's patrol shift just started and runs until ten. We got plenty of time."

I respond, "Perfect. Get changed and we'll do this."

Ben vs. Toby

I strip off my bike shorts, revealing a pair of black and magenta trunks underneath. I figured he'd want to wrestle right away. I'm sure he thinks he's going to knock me out again, but I've got other plans.


I stretch out my 6'/205-lbs of muscle as Toby gets changed. He comes out wearing a pair of black speedos. The cowboy looks good, I have to admit. At 5'10"/175-lbs, he's smaller than me, but with a great body. Lean and ripped, he's one handsome and sexy musclestud.


The cowboy walks from his room into another then emerges dragging mats. I'm surprised he has them, but he says his little brother Beau wrestles. I don't really care, I'm glad to have mats, instead of carpet or a mattress. Once the furniture is shifted and the mats are laid, we waste no time getting at it.

When we get close, Toby throws a fast, hard punch, but I'm ready this time. I block the right cross and his left when he tries to sneak it in. I grab his right wrist and slap on a standing armbar, twisting his arm hard. Since he leads with it, I figure it's the best place to start - take away his top weapon. With Toby under my control, I lash out, punching the arm and slamming my forearm onto the bicep. He grunts in pain as I twist against his shoulder and punish his muscles.

The cowboy tries to move in close to me, but I counter his moves, keeping up the pressure. He kicks out, but misses, so I sweep behind his leg, dropping him to his knees. I lift the armbar as now I have even more leverage and he has fewer options. I keep twisting and punching until he manages to roll forward and yank his arm free. The handsome cowboy rises to his feet, shaking out his arm.

I smirk and flex, challenging him to do the same. He starts to go for a double bicep, but I can see his right arm won't fully cooperate. Perfect. His flexing gives me the chance to kick my foot right into his abs, forcing him to double over right into a front facelock. I grab the side of his trunks and lift, flipping him down to the mat with a stiff, fast snap suplex.

Toby moans as I roll over him and grab his right arm. I wrap my legs around his arm, bending the tightly muscled limb against my leg. My feet hold his chest down as he squirms to relieve the pressure from his aching arm. I pound some more fists into his bicep, really digging my knuckles into the muscle.

"You fucking bastard!" Toby yells as I torture his arm. His moans grow louder as I control him.

I roll up, sitting on his arm. I pound his shoulder as he swats at my fists with his left arm, trying to block my blows. I grab his left wrist and force his arm under his head, pinning it to the mat. I hold his right wrist flat then lift my legs up, coming down on his extended right arm. BWAP! I drive my knee into his weakening arm three times before he manages to squirm free. He rolls onto his left side, grabbing at his bicep, swearing under his breath.

I grab the cowboy's ankle then plant my feet against the back. I grab his right arm, easily bending it back to me as I sit on the mat and fold him against my feet. The lean musclestud is stretched out in the bow and arrow, unable to get free. His groans grow louder as I pull one foot back and kick at his back. I keep my grip tight on his wrist and ankle, making escape impossible. Toby cries out, trying to withstand the abuse I'm dishing out.

I let go of Toby, kicking him onto his stomach. He starts to crawl, but I'm too fast. I grab his feet and fold them together. I step between his thighs, my foot sliding under his pouch then lock his feet in front of my shin. With his legs locked, I lean forward and punch his back and sides. As I anticipate, his arms come back to defend his body. I grab his wrists tight.

"No, no ..." Toby cries out, knowing he's in trouble.

I mock him, "Yes, yes ... unless you wanna submit?"

"Fuck you - OOOOO!" Toby screams out as I rock back, dragging him up and back. I end up on my back, with the cowboy stud hanging in the air over my body.

Toby moans in pain, his knees and shoulders feeling the burn of my hold. The lean muscleman can't break free, all he can do is suffer. I keep up the pressure, knowing I'm breaking him down with every second he remains up in the air. I finally let go, throwing him to my right. The cowboy lands face down on the mat, whimpering.

I get to my feet then grab Toby by the hair and force him up. The cowboy tries to throw a right, but his arm is limp and has no power left. I smirk, forgetting he has a left, too. POW! Toby's left fist comes up, right into my abs. I grunt and pause, giving him time to drive his left shoulder into my abs and drive me into the wall. WHAM!

Toby falls back onto his left side. Using his left arm as a brace, he kicks his right foot up, slamming it into my gut, just above the waistband of my trunks. OOF! The cowboy draws back then does it again. OOF! I double over, giving him the chance to grab my hair. He drags me down to the mat, my face landing in his big pouch. Next thing I know, his legs are wrapped around my head and I'm smothered in a head scissors. URGH!

Toby squeezes hard, but I push up quickly, lifting his legs. The cowboy tries to power me down, but I bend him in half. He fires a fist at my head, but it deflects off. I grab under Toby's back and power him up then slam his back down to the mat. He loses the scissors, but I don't let his legs fall. I step over Toby's back and lock him into a Boston crab. ARGH! I shake out my head as I sit back in the hold.

Toby pounds the mat in frustration, fighting the pain in his back. I ask him if he wants to give, but he says no. Fine with me. I lean back even harder. The lean musclestud can't move me, but he also won't give. I hold the crab for a long time then drop his legs and stand up. As Toby recovers, I stomp his back then circle around his prone body. I grab the back of his black trunks and force him to his feet. I grab him under his shoulder and between his legs. I lift him up and drop him over my knee in a gutbuster. OOF! I casually push him off my leg and onto his back.

Toby coughs as I rise up beside him. I drop my knee, driving it into his abs. WHOMP! The cowboy moans, but when I try again, he lifts his knee into my side, toppling me into his rising left fist. CRACK! Toby delivers a left right across my chin, staggering me to my knees. He kicks out, smacking my temple with his foot then he rises to his feet. A knee to my head has me seeing stars as he grabs me by the hair and trunks, forcing me to my feet.

The cowboy spins and launches me across the mat. I slam into the sofa and tumble over the back of it onto the hardwood floor of the kitchen. I shake out my head only to see Toby launching himself off the back of the couch into the air. Before I can react, the lean musclestud splashes down on top of me. WHOMP! OOF!  Toby rises up, dragging me up by my hair.

I'm trying to gather my wits as Toby launches me back over the sofa. I roll off the cushions onto my back on the mats. The cowboy delivers another splash, coming back the other way that drives all the air out of me. He grabs the front of my trunks with his right hand, pulling my hips up. Before I can do anything, Toby slams his fist into my lower abs, just above my pubes. ARGH! He pulls my trunks down in front, leaving them resting so low that they leave half an inch of trimmed pubes exposed.

Toby pounds on my low abs, slamming into the soft part above my crotch. POW! POW! POW! I grunt and groan with each shot, unable to fight back. The cowboy rises up and starts stomping on my abs. STOMP! STOMP! STOMP! The ripped stud plants his foot on the area and steps across me. I groan as he walks over me two more times, planting all his weight on my softened lower abs.

The cowboy drags me up to my feet again, pushing me against the wall. He slaps my face, mocking me as he moves in to torture my abs some more. As he slams in with his left fist, I twist and grab his right arm and lift it. I push off the wall, moving under his arm and twisting it behind his back. I slam him face first into the wall. WHAM! Toby goes limp as I drag him out and slam him against the wall, right shoulder first. WHAM! ARGH! He cries out as I force his hand up to his shoulder blade.

With Toby immobilized, I wrap my hand around his neck and push him down onto his back. He lands with his right arm under him, causing him to shake and writhe on the mat, immediately reaching for his wrecked arm. I pace along the mat for a minute, regrouping. The cowboy's tough, but I know I can kick his ass. Toby rolls onto his knees, with his head on the mat. He's clutching his right shoulder with his left hand.

I circle behind the handsome stud, measuring him up. His bubble butt looks tasty. I wish we'd discussed stakes. I adjust my pouch as my mind wanders to fucking that tight ass. From behind, I bend forward and grab Toby by the hair. I drag him up to his feet. WHOA! I'm surprised as Toby backpedals right into me, using his body to power me into the wall. OOF!

Toby spins around, but I'm not nearly as winded as he expects. I charge forward, wrapping his head into a tight front facelock. He grunts as I tighten my grip, turning it into a front sleeper. He punches my body, but I withstand the blows. I squeeze harder and he goes limp as I steal his consciousness.

"Say good night, cowboy!"

I savor the moment, holding off on knocking Toby completely out. I want him to feel it coming and know he's helpless to stop me, figuring its fitting payback. I feel him getting weaker when I hear a deep voice behind me.

"Tobe, I forgot my ... what the fuck?"

I spin us around so I can see who said that. I'm shocked to see a hulking behemoth in the doorway. He's in jeans, open plaid shirt and a brown cowboy hat. Oh shit. This must be Beau.


I drop Toby's limp body on the floor, ignoring his coughing as he tries to regain his breath. I've suddenly got a bigger problem. And I do mean bigger. Toby's little brother is younger, but in no way is he little. No wonder he's on security detail. He's 6'1" and 230-lbs of muscle. If there's body fat on him, I can't see it. The dude is ripped like crazy, with muscles that are popping and bulging all over.

 I say, "Dude, whoa. I know this --"

Before I can say anything more, he's on top of me. The big cowboy powers me around, engulfing my head in his huge arms and pulling me in close against his granite body. I struggle against the rear naked choke, throwing my elbows back, but he doesn't move. I see Toby rise and fall into the wall, holding his head.


I try to tell Toby to tell his brother to let me go, but all he does is stare at my helplessness. The hold is so tight that no words emerge. One second later, everything goes black.

To be continued ...

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