Review: Jonny Firestorm vs. Joe Robbins (BGEast)

When BGEast first teased their new catalogue (139), I knew right away that I wanted Jonny Firestorm vs. Joe Robbins. Of all the matches on there, it was the main one that I fixated on, which is weird because, no offense to him, I've never been a Joe Robbins fan. He's big and handsome, but he's never wowed me. The few times I've seen him, he seemed too cool for school and like he's going through the motions.

What sold me on this video is Jonny Firestorm and the promise of seeing him kick Joe's ass. I knew I'd have to endure the reverse, but I figured that would only make it sweeter. I also knew if anyone could get a great performance out of the big man, it'd be Jonny.

It's okay, Jonny. I know you're
cooking up something good.

This is young Jonny. Fresh-faced, ripped and cocky. He looks like an angel but is actually pure devil. He's not intimidated by the muscle monster in the ring and he's not going to back down. Joe is his usual detached self, with (perhaps deserved) supreme confidence. They flex and posture then things get going a couple of minutes in. This is a 48-minute video with a clear split right around halfway in when dominance shifts, so first up it's 90% Joe then it's 90% Jonny.

I thought I wanted this ...

... but I actually liked this.

And I loved this.

If I'm picking which half I liked more (Joe dominating Jonny vs. Jonny dominating Joe), you can tell by my image selection. It's 9-1 towards Jonny as victim. I normally go the other way, enjoying the big bruiser upended by the little stud (and I obviously expected to here, as well), but there are a couple of reasons why this one works out better the other way for me.

First reason? Performances. In the first half, the action plays into their strengths. Yes, Jonny is one of the best heels of all-time, but he's also one of the best jobbers. He knows how to sell and he's cute as fuck as a victim. I love his character here - the cocky sore loser. Jonny refuses to give Joe his due even as he gets thoroughly destroyed, submitted and pinned over and over. Very Xaq (one of my most popular story characters). Joe is a good dominator, but doesn't really play victim well.

Ouch! Even I felt that!

With authority!

Like. He's. Nothing.

Second reason? The action. In the first half, Joe is relentless with the power moves. He can lift, throw, bend and slam the lightweight like he's nothing. It feels powerful and painful. Jonny repeatedly arches beautifully, thrusting his tight body and packed trunks at the camera as his face is etched with pain. It's non-stop heat and intensity. Jonny fights back a little, which only makes his ruination even hotter.

When he gets his turn, Jonny is more limited in what he can do to Joe because the big guy is dead weight. It's not that the second half is bad. I love Jonny destroying big guys, but Joe is not one of the best jobbers. He just doesn't sell nearly as well and he doesn't help enough to make the action sing.

Standout moves are Joe's suplex where he holds Jonny upside-down for over 20 seconds before bringing him down hard. There's the crazy suspended leg scissors in the opening image where Jonny sways for 25 seconds. All Joe's slams are huge, his rack vicious, and his backbreakers made MY back hurt. All first half. It's pure humiliation as might makes right and the only thing not wrecked is Jonny's cockiness.

Jonny's reversal comes via low blows. He does bend Joe's big body into some good stretches and uses the ropes and ring apron well to go at the big guys knee. The most memorable parts of the second half are a lot of hair pulling and a potential wardrobe malfunction (that never comes) as Joe's trunks open up a little in back. I so wanted them to split, even though I knew that Joe's not that kind of guy.

Twenty seconds then BOOM!

Like he's trash!

One finger!

In the end, this is great value - two action-packed matches that are bound to please anyone. I prefer the first part as both guys get to shine. Joe's power moves are amazing and Jonny makes them even hotter. However, Jonny is a star in both halves and it is nice to see Joe get his ass kicked. It's not like you're paying extra, so enjoy both parts. I'd just re-visit the first half.

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RINGSIDE: PHENOMENON

So, that's my take. What's yours?

Alex