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Wednesday, March 13, 2019

Review: Calvin Haynes vs. Kirk Donahue (BGEast)

When it comes to heel turns, I feel like a good guy jobber just finally snapping is one of the classic tropes. He loses and loses then finally says, “Screw this, I’m done playing by the rules. I’m gonna do what it takes to win!” This happens a lot in tag teams when one partner just loses it and beats the crap out of his partner. It’s fun. Unless you’re the guy’s first victim.

In our part of the pro wrestling world, there are many guys switch back-and-forth from good guy to bad guy or dominant to jobber, but usually there’s no reason why. Brad Rochelle’s turn in The Contract series is the only guy I can think of who’s clearly played this out. Now, there’s another with Calvin Haynes vs. Kirk Donahue.

It's nice guy jobber vs. nice guy jobber ... or is it?


I feel like Kirk Donahue is like a stealth superstar. He’s been around five years, appearing in enjoyable matches steadily every few catalogues and even winning Besties and a Cavey along the way. Kirk’s bendy, expressive and a top-notch seller. Plus, he’s got some skills, too. For example, he was really impressive in the Wrestling with Pride event last year. I’d argue that he compares favorably with all-time great BGEast jobbers.

And yet, he’s not a must-buy for me for some reason. It seems like I always pick up his matches for his opponent then remember how much I like him. Maybe it’s because Kirk comes across as such a nice guy. He’s got a sweet freckled face, penny eyes and a big smile. I somehow forget how hot his body is and how beautifully he packs his trunks in front and back. The guy is a stud, but I totally under-appreciate him. Well, no more. Kirk, I appreciate you.

How do I always forget about Kirk?

Kirk's a little late for my 'gold' post.

Kirk works it out.

In this jobber vs. jobber match, Calvin Haynes is the same BGEast jobber we’ve seen before. He’s stretched his dominant muscles elsewhere, but at BGEast, he’s still a beefy nice guy. I feel like Calvin’s probably a natural jobber even in private matches, so he probably doesn’t mind it at all. Opposite him, Kirk’s apparently not as comfortable being a hapless jobber. He’s had enough and is done playing by the rules. Calvin is the first guy to find out.

It’s a little weird to me that this video appears on a Calvin Haynes Spotlight rather than as the anchor on a Kirk Donahue Spotlight. Maybe BGEast had a bunch of Calvin matches to burn and worried about how ubiquitous he’s become so they didn’t want to hold onto them any longer. No matter the reason, I will tell you that, in my opinion, this is 100% a Kirk Donahue match.

Maybe cheating's not as easy as it looks, Kirk.

Kirk wanted to flip his career trajectory,
but I don't think this is what he intended.

Kirk knows how to keep a beefy brute down.

Action-wise, the guys keep things simple with a lot of mat work, chokes and body-displaying holds. And what bodies. I love seeing Calvin manhandled by the lean and ripped bad boy. It’s not a 100% squash until about halfway through. They keep things moving and the suffering is amazing. There are a lot of submissions and one of the best parts is how the guys hold on past “I give”, making the other stud scream and beg louder.

There’s a lot of chatter from Kirk in this one as he savors his newfound dark side. He refers to himself in the third person a lot. And classic heel fans will enjoy how cowardly and hypocritical he is. He cheats, begs and even gets angry at Calvin for not breaking a hold, even though he did it first. Yep, Kirk knows his pro wrestling personalities.

Kirk's tired of losing.

Somebody's enjoying being a bad boy.

Big Calvin gets a lot more than he bargained for.

In the end, I really liked this one. Kirk’s surprise heel turn made it even more exciting, but I probably would’ve liked seeing these two contrasting sexy jobbers no matter what. The action is hot and well-executed. Quiet and affable Calvin is more of a furry sex object here as he lets the smooth ripped stud have his moment to shine.

What are other bloggers saying?


So that’s my take. What’s yours?

Alex

9 comments:

  1. This looks like a hot match that I will check out eventually. I've always appreciated Kirk and would consider him one of BG East's best jobbers too. It's good to see him turn heel though, he's been around 5 years now so it's time for a change. That said, I hope he's not exclusively a heel now, he's too good at jobbing not to do it again.

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    1. Well, he could always be a heel-jobber. It’s one thing to beat Calvin. It’d be quite another for him to face a real heel. I do expect BGEast has some classic good guy jobber Kirk matches in their vault.

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  2. I like the idea of Calvin's spotlight being wrenched from him by a former jobber being intentional. Looking at the 3 matches together gives me the impression of Calvin trying to assert some dominance in the BG arena by going after newbies and jobbers, only to crash hard from his hubris.

    My personal biases makes me root for Calvin winning a rematch, especially with Kirk's expert heel persona, but this isn't TV wrestling, and I have a feeling you're correct about him enjoying his time as a jobber.

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    1. That’s a great point on Calvin having his spotlight taken from him. I haven’t seen the rest of the compilation, but whether it’s intentional or not, I’m going to make that my head canon.

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  3. I could watch Calvin getting manhandled all day long. I think sitting on his face and working over his big pecs, hot nips and full belly would be hot. His body is made for getting worked over. Thumb his navel and watch him stomp his feet would put me over the edge, guaranteed.

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    1. Thanks for the awesome mental image, Dino. I can totally picture that. And I bet Calvin would love it, too.

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  4. I've always been intrigued by the heel-face-jobber paradigm. Is it a discrete hierarchy? Is it more a continuium? Is it a consciousness choice? Or do some people have jobber status thrust upon them due to lack of skill or native aggression? Bob Emory comes to mind as one who seems to have lacked aggression and always had the crap beat out of him (although Tommy Angel sold it better). Calvin seems to be one who makes the choice. He certainly shows the heel potential in some venues, and it's hot as hell seeing him dominate. But his nature seems too relaxed for full on heel. Now as for heel turns, that's always a fun trope, seeing the years of frustrated dominance break through. Guys like Kirk appear more heel by nature who had jobber status thrust upon them.

    Or it's all just about the money and what sells. ;-)

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    1. Well, I’m no expert, but I look at it thusly ... heels and faces are at opposite ends of a spectrum. Say a 7 point scale. Absolute good guys are a 1 and absolute bad guys are a 7. Then you have good guys who can get rough in that 2-3 area, anti-heroes as 4’s then bad guys with some redeeming qualities, such as the noble heel as 5-6.

      Jobbers can be heels or faces. After all, dominant good guys still need someone to beat up. That’s where Iron Mike Sharpe and Barry Horowitz go. I separated jobbers at the Caveys this year for that reason. What bad boys like Ty Alexander or Scrappy do when they job is very different than rule followers like Calvin or Kirk (before this match).

      I’d say most of the time the roles are thrust upon them based on need and personality. In our world, it’s also based on looks. I think people in charge tend to assign the prettiest boys as face jobbers because they think we want to see them get their asses kicked. That’s my guess.

      However, some guys come in already wrestling and I think they probably have more say because they get it. Calvin seems like a guy who’s wrestled before BGEast and had a POV on his preferred role. Kirk seems like a guy who’s wrestled before BGEast and was assigned a jobber role based on looks and is now getting the chance to stretch. Again, I could be completely wrong.

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    2. That's a fantastic analysis. Nuanced. To paraphrase Homer, your ideas are intriguing to me, and I'm glad I subscribe to your newsletter.

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