Review: Batman vs. Superman XXX (MEN.com)

IN CASE ALL THE X'S WEREN'T ENOUGH OF A CLUE, THIS IS A REVIEW OF PORN, SO IT'S EVEN MORE "NOT SAFE FOR WORK" THAN MY USUAL STUFF!

Yesterday, I talked about the X-Men porn parody from MEN.com. Today, I'll cover the first one they did, Batman v Superman XXX: A Gay Porn Parody.

Bruce and Clark

Even though I said this yesterday, I'm going to repeat myself, because it's somewhat relevant for these videos, plus it makes good reinforcement.

1. These are 100% porn where the point is to see guys fuck, not engage in a deep study of vigilantism or personal responsibility or get into things like wrestling, bondage or domination.

2. I'm not a porn guy. I don't watch porn without superheroes or wrestling involved and barely even that. So it's tough for me to say if it's good porn. I have included links to Gay Comic Geek's site where he does video reviews from both a geek and a porn perspective, if you're interested.

Here's a rundown on the scenes.

#1: Superman. The series starts out at a benefit hosted by Bruce Wayne. Clark Kent is badgering Mr. Smith, a bald villain who is not Lex Luthor. Bruce and Clark makes comments about Batman's methods vs. Superman's, so there's a setup, although I will spoil that it doesn't really lead to anything.

The rest of the video is Superman saving then fucking random victim #1. He might not be completely random as Superman does say, "This time I got you safe. I can't keep on protecting you like this, though." So maybe the bottom is supposed to be a Lois analog or Jimmy. They don't say.

As with X-Men, the look, tone and feel are all really well done. Now, the hero is out of his costume for most of it, which I didn't like. On the plus side, Batman watches the whole thing from a distance, which is interesting.

Superman stays in costume for the foreplay

Whoever he's supposed to be, this guy
is the luckiest guy in the world

But the suit is off for the main event

Although it's picked up by a curious onlooker

#2: Batman. Bruce and Clark run into each other, chat then we have Batman saving a random dude. He's about to leave when the victim says it's the second time this has happened - Superman just saved him, too (but it's not the guy from part 1). Anyway, Batman wants to know more, so they have sex.

Interestingly, Batman is the bottom for random victim #2. Story-wise, nothing happen, it ends on a kiss. The thugs spray paint an 'R' on the guy's shirt before Batman comes in, so I thought it was a tease for Robin, but nope. It's porn so random guy is just a random guy.

I really liked that the hero stayed in costume for the whole thing. The set and action are more what I think of as standard porn. The location just a bland, dressed room and the guys are fucking pretty much immediately. If you want to see Batman having sex, this is a pretty good way to do it.

Batman wants to know about Superman

His questioning techniques sure are different
than I remember, but I like the new approach

It's kind of a twist that the hero admires the civilian

#3: Superman + Batman. This is the chapter that really reminds you that this is just porn. Bald villain (Not!Lex) has hot guys caged up when suddenly, Superman and Batman arrive and defeat him. Superman dodges bullets and punches Mr. Smith in the chest without killing him. I guess he's de-powered here. The heroes let the villain walk off! What? It's porn.

Anyway, they rescue the guys and sex ensues without any explanation or reason. No idea how Batman and Superman are working together. It's porn. Group sex, ending with Superman topping Batman and shooting all over the cowl. On the plus side, Superman stays in costume the entire time, so that's really cool.

Men uses a lot of quick cuts for action,
but you can follow it

Superman's priority is rescue over capture

Heroes top regular people

But the superhero hierarchy is clear

Overall, I liked seeing the iconic characters in these situations. The casting is decent, the film and locations are very good, and the costumes work, although Superman's is very baggy. It feels very much like cosplay with a big budget. I would've liked a little more attention to the story, even for porn. At least some Batman vs. Superman stuff, but what're you gonna do?

What are other bloggers saying? Check out Gay Comic Geek's amazing video reviews. These links are to his NSFW (not safe for work) versions with clips of guys fucking. He does have YouTube versions you could likely search.

GAY COMIC GEEK: BVS PART 1 - A GAY XXX PORN PARODY

GAY COMIC GEEK: BVS PART 2 - A GAY XXX PORN PARODY

GAY COMIC GEEK: BVS PART 3 - A GAY XXX PORN PARODY

So that's my take. What's yours? Tomorrow, it's Captain America's turn at XXX.

Alex