Friday, January 11, 2019

Review: Brad Barnes vs. Johnny Jobber (Wrestler4Hire)

I'll be honest. Brad Barnes vs. Johnny Jobber was nowhere near my radar, but a reader actually emailed me to ask me to review it. I was flattered that he cared so much about my opinion, but it wasn't streaming, so I begged off. Fortunately, Wrestler4Hire had their recent huge 40% off sale. At that price, I figured 'what the heck?' and bought the download.

Like most story-centric squash videos, I needed to wait to be in the right mood when I watched this. I did wait and I was in the right mood. And so, I really enjoyed it.

Depending on your perspective, Brad is either the
best client a bank can have or the worst. I vote best.

Let me be honest again. I've never been a fan of Brad Barnes. I don't have anything against him, but my Brad Barnes collection only exists because I've liked his opponents (e.g., Lane Hartley, Jake Steele). I've never thought he was that attractive and he seemed like a poor man's Braden Charron. Since I like Braden-prime, why do I need another one? I formed my opinion early and have never really looked back, even as Sean Pford touted his virtues.

However, now force-exposed to this compact muscle hunk, my opinion changes fast. Like as soon as I see Brad with a beard sweeping the ring. Woof. I don't know if there's a fetish for watching mostly naked musclemen cleaning up, but there probably is. The beard changes everything and suddenly Brad looks like a 50's hunk from a 'sword and sandals' movie. Stunning. Okay, so he's a lot hotter than I remember.

Better yet, Brad shows personality, skills and just owns the screen, captivating me as he defends his turf against an overly eager banker. He's cool and charming with just the right amount of menace. Now I'm wondering if I've been missing out on a super-stud all this time because I rushed to judgment. Shame on me.

Bearded Brad looks better than ever.

Woof. Bearded Brad is brilliant.

Lucky Johnny wore white jobber gear under his suit.

The story is simple. Brad owns a ring. He's a proud ring owner who likes to keep his place neat and tidy. I respect that. Unfortunately, he's also a deadbeat. Turns out, Brad is behind on his payments. Johnny Jobber is an entry-level stooge at Max Quivers' bank. In what is likely a setup of epic proportions, Johnny's unseen boss "Tonya" tells Brad he can wait to pay (according to Brad, at least) then sends Johnny to collect. Bitch.

So, the unsuspecting Johnny does what anyone would do ... he dons Max Quivers' suit (I mean, it is seriously huge on the lightweight jobber) and comes in demanding payment. Needless to say, the banker gets knocked out with a cleaning rag, stripped and then tortured for 15 minutes. Worse, Brad ends up talking to Max, complaining about Johnny's complete lack of professionalism, and gets the big man to come down to personally take care of it. And so, the junior banker gets his comeuppance (for expecting someone to pay their bills?) as he's fired then carried off for more discipline from Max Quivers.

Just a simple businessman, cleaning his ring.

Someone needs to tell banker Johnny that putting on
Max Quivers' suit doesn't make him Max Quivers.

Never mind, Brad shows him that clothes
do not necessarily make the man.

As you'd expect, the story sets up the action, which consists of a one-sided beatdown by the  classically handsome muscleman. With a name like Johnny Jobber, this can't be a surprise to anyone, right? Mr. Jobber looks perfect as a soft-bellied victim in white gear (worn under his suit, so who knows how unsuspecting he truly is).

Brad bends, crushes and generally manhandles the helpless young banker with popular submission holds and body punishment. What elevates this is the extra humiliation, as Brad takes pics and makes calls during the annihilation. Because Johnny's just that pathetic. Maybe Brad doesn't just look like an ancient muscleman. Maybe he is one? Anyway, you get it and you know if you're interested.

Brad complains directly to the
big man about customer service.

Boss Max doesn't appreciate Johnny embarrassing
his bank and alienating a sexy customer.

Brad takes out the trash as Max plans
some re-training for Mr. Jobber.

In the end, I watched this at the right time and thought it was really fun. Brad Barnes looks, acts and wrestles really well. Is it possible that I've been wrong less right that I usually am all this time? Johnny makes a good victim, once he's pulled out of those ridiculous clothes. Max's appearance is short, but gets the mind racing as we're left to imagine what comes next (my personal guess is that this is actually a game that boss Max and boy Johnny play often and they actually set Brad up to help add some spice to their relationship).

What are other bloggers saying?

So that's my take. What's yours?




  2. I enjoyed this one but by god does Johnny look ridiculous in that suit. Thankfully, he doesn't have it on for long. Glad to see him back at W4H.

    Also, I have an extremely similar opinion with regard to Braden and Brad. Braden is one of my favorite jobbers but I almost always pass on Brad matches. I gotta say he does trash talk a lot better than Braden. I'll try to keep an open mind towards his future matches and old ones.

    1. That’s funny. I thought I was the only one who’d link the two.